Complicated

During the SUP groups I lead, I read short vignettes written by author Bob Lupton. He moved into the inner city (Atlanta) with his family decades ago. Their hope was to depend on Jesus and seek and learn more about his Kingdom there. I've read and re-read stories about how messy it is to live in the inner city. I always feel for him as he writes and I read about the good and bad choices he makes and what Jesus offers him within those choices. I always think, "good for him," and sometimes, some days I can relate.

Oh, I live in the inner city too. My family and I live here. We love it here. We hang out with neighbors, or try, and swap stories and share food and life together.

But just like with Bob Lupton's stories and experiences, living here can be ripe with complication. The neighbor who is losing the house his family has called home for years (gambling but also grueling migrant work involved), the neighbor who I'm unable to communicate with because our mother tongues (or current languages) don't match, the little neighbor who thinks her dad works at jail but that's not why he's actually there, and the neighbor who has no home but lots of baggage who has chosen me as her go-to-girl.

What are the solutions? Are there solutions? Am I supposed to try and fix or solve what I perceive as problems? When I am faced with people and choices, I often respond in two ways: 1. to go all out and walk fiercely with or on behalf of the person or people who are broken or 2. to recoil and try to step away from the person or issue and more or less wish it away. People are plain complicated. I am and my life has been relatively tempered. I can't imagine either growing up or living in deep mess and pain and brokenness that comes from abuse, addiction, poverty, neglect, resource deprivation, and all kinds of inherited or generational or other family complications. Not to mention systems. Oy vay. COMPLICATIONS ABOUND!

I believe that being a follower of Jesus complicates my response further. God LOVES my neighbors. More fiercely than I ever do or can. And he's witty, quick on his feet, compassionate, firm, and so much more. He knows how to respond to situations that seem bigger than me, that I have no clue about, or that I don't even care or think to care about.
How to respond to the current complications? I choose thankfulness. I'm thankful that god became flesh and moved into the neighborhood. I'm glad he invited me to do something similar. I'm thankful for the neighbors I have who heeded the same invitation and walk alongside of me into mess, and I'm thankful for the neighbors who present opportunities for me and my faithful, god-following neighbors to seek him and his kingdom. I'm thankful that living here reminds me that I don't have the answers (which sometimes college educated people forget is true or pretend to know). I'm so thankful that god did not create just one person, but many people, and that we all are made in his image and we can see god in each person -- complicated, messy or not.

May god's mercy go before and follow us as we live as neighbors seeking shalom!


(My last thought/questions... Why do we always want everything to be perfect and tidy and easy? Any thoughts?)